The Grass Has Grown!

Last Wednesday night, continuing the "You Asked for It!" series, we raised some questions about the use of profanity. I ended the last post stating a few principles to take home in learning to honor God with our lips. The first one was to realize that transformation happens slowly and only over time.

After class (and in class) several students talked about being unable to control the words that come out of their mouth instinctually. The examples mentioned were moments when there was no time to consider what they said. They crush their thumb with a hammer. Someone scares the living ...uh... daylights out of them. Or they fall off a chair or down the stairs. In these moments, they told me, there is no way to avoid using profanity.

I thought about myself as students were telling me these things. Does profanity even come to my mind during these instinctual moments? While I struggle to know what verbal response I typically have, I have a hard time remembering the last time profanity crossed my mind in those moments. Other moments (like when I'm angry) bring those thoughts out for me.

"How did this happen?" I kept asking myself. I know profanity used to be the norm for me almost all the time, especially in moments when I was reacting on instinct! How could I even forget that these moments were a no-brainer when it came to moments I would certainly cuss?

My answer: Transformation.

Last Wednesday night was one of those moments when I looked at the grass (so-to-speak) and noticed that it has grown to be rather green! It seems like yesterday the grass was just seed in need of germinating. Meaning: I too thought it impossible to transform instinct. Yet, my instinct is changed!

How did the grass grow? I happened slowly...and over time. One choice here. Avoiding that word there. Exploring creative ways to express myself differently. "Gina! The monkey has caught my brain instead of the banana and turned the sucker upside down right before my eyes! Things are backwards! Yet, the kingdom grows with each choice."

It takes time to transform a mind! And there are no shortcuts! It takes intentional work. Hard work. Work that you sometimes forget about. Then you remember. Then you forget again. And then someone reminds you of how things used to be for you...on a Wednesday night!

God is in the business of transformation! And He is amazingly patient as the grass continues to grow as he designed it! Grow grass grow!

Why Worship

Last night in the combined Bible class we dared to broach the subject of worship! Instead of focusing on the 'how' questions, we focused on the 'why.' We were seeking to make connections between our worship of God and our life outside of worship. It seemed like many tables were having great discussion! I enjoyed our discussion.

As I prepared for this class, I was reminded of a previous blog post I wrote several years ago on a Monday. It reminds me of a couple of reasons why I have come to worship God. One is a completely unhealthy reason I sometimes come to worship (to be critical) and another is more healthy reason (to be moved by God). I have made a few edits...I hope you enjoy.

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Being honest, I sat yesterday in our weekly Sunday service with a critical eye. I was going to see if 'they' could move me...whoever 'they' were. The service began normally. I had seen it before, heard it before, prayed it before, and gone through that motion before. I was wearing the t-shirt. As we progressed through the service, I found myself trying to focus on what was happening. However, I kept thinking about me doing what I was doing. Nothing was moving me at all. I was anticipating after service when I could tell someone (probably Tanya) how 'they' never moved me in that worship. Time for the invitation song.

"Lay Your Burdens Down..." the song begins. As I stood to let other people respond (obviously excluding myself) to the message the thought occurred to me, "Why is this the song of invitation? It is such a great song!" I stood anyway, closed my eyes, sang, and was overwhelmed by a gracious, divine surprise.

This song moved me! Rather, God used this song to move me. Seriously...I was shaking by the end of the song. Oddly enough, I was still trying to stop shaking because I wanted to prove my point that nothing in the service could move me. Then I could wallow in my own self-absorption of an empty worship service. But, something else happened. I was moved. It was God. I could do nothing to stop it! Amazing!

Reflecting on this over the last day, I have learned how much I need to grow! Why am I coming to worship trying to prove that nothing will move me? I need to be seeking in coming to worship the very thing I was avoiding: God's presence. Yet, amazingly enough, God was gracious to allow a song to usher his presence into my life. How many times does God use songs to move me in worship? Too many.

Thank you, God, for being so gracious. Thank you for your patience with me. I need to grow so much. Let me continue to be aware of your presence in my life. May your praise be on my lips throughout the day. Keep me from the cynicism I experienced yesterday...all for your glory. You are the one I need. Let me seek you alone.

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I wonder what are some reasons that you come to worship (good or bad, healthy or unhealthy)? Share in the comments section below.

God's Process

Yesterday I reconnected with two of my High School friends through facebook. Thinking back to those days draws me into reflection on how God has moved me in this journey toward full life with him. From golf to accounting to marriage to graduate school to ministry God has moved me closer to his heart slowly over these last 12 years. It is a process that takes time...a lifetime. God's patience truly does mean salvation.

The "Key" to Being a Christian

Wow! You can tell that the spring semester is more busy than the fall semester just by looking at how much I post. That makes the posts more meaningful I guess.

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We got stuck outside our house on Sunday trying to lock and unlock our front door! The key would not move. The sad thing is that I knew my key was getting harder and harder to use each day I used it. I have always had to lift up on the key to unlock it...but not too much. Sometimes I could push the key in and out a couple of times quickly and it would do the trick. Other times...well...I don't know how I got it open.

But Sunday was different. Sunday was the day that Tanya's key wasn't working either. After her failed attempts, I gave it a whirl (because guys can always do what women can't, right?). Five minutes later (after being humbled in my pride) the door opened. I don't know what I did except get a little bit more impatient with my efforts and this dumb door!

Finally, we got it locked in time to go to church. As we were pulling out of the driveway, Tanya realized that we had forgotten something! What!!?? You are kidding me!! So, my door and I had another go-round. It didn't take quite as long, but I switched from my key to Tanya's several times. It was frustrating. The door finally opened and we went to church.

The next morning I finally got around to taking it apart and fixing our door lock. A little lever was a little bent, and it needed some lubrication. All is well now and our keys work fine. The door unlocks and opens when we want it too.

This got me to thinking (surprise, surprise!). This passage jumped to my mind:
"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."

I noticed the door being opened. There is no key to the door mentioned. It is not "knock and a key will be given so you can open the door." No, knock and the door will be opened to you. It is not by my power that the door opens. The door just opens. It is not by my efforts. It is not by my efforts. God is working, not Chris.

Let us knock on the door and have the patience for it to open.

The Holy Spirit Preventing

I have always wondered about the following passage in Acts:

"Paul and his companions traveled throughout the region of Phrygia and
Galatia, having been kept by the Holy Spirit from preaching the word in the
province of Asia. When they came to the border of Mysia, they tried to enter
Bythinia, but the Spirit of Jesus would not allow them to. Do they passed by
Mysia and went down to Troas." Acts 16:6-8

What? Why would God prevent them from preaching the word? I thought we were able to do that wherever we went. At least this is what I tell students! And what is going on with the Spirit of Jesus not allowing them to enter Bythinia? Why would this happen? Basically, I am full of questions concerning this passage.

Not only this, but I have similar questions regarding my recent frustrations with LST in Huntsville. My efforts are going nowhere! Is the Holy Spirit preventing this evangelistic opportunity in Huntsville? I don't know, but why would this happen? Does Friends Speak need to be up and running before LST will have a chance? What is going on?

As of now, it looks like myself and LeeAnn are the ones wanting to go on a project. Even in my commitment, I must wrestle with the familial sacrifices it would take. I don't understand what is happening. All I can do right now is wait...and continue to wrestle with God's will!

Give me understanding, Lord. Let me be patient as I wait on your timing. I am dumbfounded...please enlighten me.