Going Bananas and Getting a Blessing

Last Sunday I was humbled by seven bananas!

After church last Sunday, Kayla and I ran by the grocery store to pick up some bananas. Tyler, my son, was sick at home with Tanya, and we needed to keep his diet very bland. We needed bananas. No big deal...or so I thought.

So, we went to the produce section, picked out about seven good looking bananas, and headed to check out. As I was visually trying to determine the best checkout line to enter I reach in my back pocket for my wallet and stop! Great! No wallet!

If there was a day that I would forget my wallet, it would be on a Sunday! I usually get dressed right before leaving for church and many times forget my wallet on my bathroom sink. Most of the time I forget my wallet, however, I would realize it before even getting to the store.

What was I supposed to do now?

I look around to see if there is anyone I know that I could ask to borrow some money. No one! And that was weird, because I always see someone I know at this store...and especially right after church on Sunday! Ahh! Now what?

As I walk back toward produce I think to myself with Kayla a little confused, "Do I put the bananas back, go home, drop off Kayla, and come back?" I'd hate to do that!

I stop for a second to consider other options. An open checkout line comes available. The checker comes to the end of the isle, looks at me (bananas in hand), does the little eyebrow thing that asks without words, "Are you ready to checkout, sir?" I decline his offer shaking my head and think to myself, "No...I'm the idiot who left his wallet at home and is standing here like a moron with some bananas in one hand and a daughter holding the other asking me what we are doing!"

I tell Kayla that I forgot my wallet and I'm trying to figure out what we can do.

At that point, I considered asking a complete stranger! It was a crazy thought as I lingered on it for a second scanning the isles looking for prospects. Fragile, white-haired, church-suit guy with tons of stuff in his basket? No. Too long of a wait. And when would I ask him? After he started checking? Pass.

Larger, middle-aged, barely-making-it lady buying a lot of food in regular clothes? Pass.

Last option: Younger, 30ish-mother, buying cupcakes in the speedy checkout lane? Okay.

I begin to go toward that checkout lane again and think, "What am I doing? I'm about to ask a complete stranger to buy some bananas? Ahh! What? Am I going to get her number and send her a check for one dollar of bananas? Do I ask her for her address?"

I stop after a couple of steps. "This is too much! I'm just going to put these bananas back, go home, and come back."

Then, on my way back to the produce area AGAIN, a new perspective crosses my bald head brain. I consider it for a second, turn around, and continue my thoughts having decided what I need to do. No more flinching!

I get to the speedy checkout lane behind this younger, dark-haired lady who is now on the phone. "Great! Do I interrupt her?" Before I have time to chicken out another guy gets in line behind me. "Oh, man! Now I'm committed!"

I look toward the back of this lady's head, lean my head over to the side with my eyebrows raised trying to make eye contact. I wanted to get her attention without saying anything. No luck. Without touching her I say, "Excuse me, mam?" She turns to me with her phone still to her ear, takes a quick glance at my awesomely beautiful redhead holding my hand, and non-verbally gives me permission to continue.

With a weird "I'm an idiot!" smirk on my face, I reached into my empty back pocket and said, "I know this is going to sound weird, but I forgot my wallet at home. And..." I paused for about a half second to take a breath and hold up my seven bananas. "...I was wondering if you would buy my bananas for me."

Silence.

The several seconds of her silent processing time seemed like four hours of humiliating torture! I lower my bananas a little. Then she says somewhat confidently as she hangs up her phone, "Sure! Throw 'em up there with my stuff. No problem!"

I put them on "the conveyor belt of shame" right on the divider thing that separates one shopper's stuff from another's. She turns to talk to Kayla a little as she waits for her turn. I'm at a loss for words. I muster up a quick yet audible, "Thank you so much! I feel weird!" She soon turns her back to me as she attends to getting out her wallet to pay for her things (and my bananas!).

"Where do I stand?" I thought. "Do I go around to the front where the bag people do their thing?" No. "Do I bag her few groceries for her as a sign of my appreciation?" Uhh..no way! That would make it worse for all parties involved.

Right then the checker finished ringing up all her things, leaving my bananas straddled on the divider. He looks at this lady and asks her, "This is where your stuff ends, right?"

"Are you kidding me!?" I think. "Why do you have to make this torture worse than it needs to be? Did you hear me ask this lady a few moments earlier to buy my bananas? Certainly everyone in the entire store heard this CRAZY MAN ask a complete stranger to buy his bananas! And, just in case someone missed it, you had to ask her to clarify for the masses my incompetence again!? Thanks, dude!"

I contained all those feelings as I looked at the floor.

She told the guy that she was paying for my bananas. He rang them up and gave her the total; she paid and started gathering her stuff. No one touched the paid-for bananas. I waited until she had cleared everything before I reached over the counter to take the grocery bag containing my seven bananas.

This whole time, I'm wondering what is the appropriate thing to say at the end of all this. A simple, "thanks" came to mind. So did an "I appreciate your generosity." Those seemed weird in the moment and superficial. The only thing I settled on was, "the Lord bless you."

I wanted to convey the Lord's involvement somehow, without being all crazy about it. My mind considered the times that I'd heard that from others. It came from mainly strangers that I'd decided to help out in various ways. I always dismissed it as some kind of unnecessary formality. I would tell them what this lady told me after I said it: "Oh it was no big deal."

This experience has many chapters of lessons that I will share for a while. These lessons started as I went to the car. I told Kayla that she just witnessed how God blesses people through others. I communicated to her that this lady displayed the heart of Jesus in a small, yet powerful way! "Her gracious generosity," I told her, "is a loud testimony to our abundantly good God!"

Have you ever been in a position to experience God's generosity, even in a small $1.07 way?

The Grass Has Grown!

Last Wednesday night, continuing the "You Asked for It!" series, we raised some questions about the use of profanity. I ended the last post stating a few principles to take home in learning to honor God with our lips. The first one was to realize that transformation happens slowly and only over time.

After class (and in class) several students talked about being unable to control the words that come out of their mouth instinctually. The examples mentioned were moments when there was no time to consider what they said. They crush their thumb with a hammer. Someone scares the living ...uh... daylights out of them. Or they fall off a chair or down the stairs. In these moments, they told me, there is no way to avoid using profanity.

I thought about myself as students were telling me these things. Does profanity even come to my mind during these instinctual moments? While I struggle to know what verbal response I typically have, I have a hard time remembering the last time profanity crossed my mind in those moments. Other moments (like when I'm angry) bring those thoughts out for me.

"How did this happen?" I kept asking myself. I know profanity used to be the norm for me almost all the time, especially in moments when I was reacting on instinct! How could I even forget that these moments were a no-brainer when it came to moments I would certainly cuss?

My answer: Transformation.

Last Wednesday night was one of those moments when I looked at the grass (so-to-speak) and noticed that it has grown to be rather green! It seems like yesterday the grass was just seed in need of germinating. Meaning: I too thought it impossible to transform instinct. Yet, my instinct is changed!

How did the grass grow? I happened slowly...and over time. One choice here. Avoiding that word there. Exploring creative ways to express myself differently. "Gina! The monkey has caught my brain instead of the banana and turned the sucker upside down right before my eyes! Things are backwards! Yet, the kingdom grows with each choice."

It takes time to transform a mind! And there are no shortcuts! It takes intentional work. Hard work. Work that you sometimes forget about. Then you remember. Then you forget again. And then someone reminds you of how things used to be for you...on a Wednesday night!

God is in the business of transformation! And He is amazingly patient as the grass continues to grow as he designed it! Grow grass grow!

Righteousness and Praise Spring Up

This is part of the Christmas Break Exercise designed to keep us focused on the way of Christ in small ways each day.

"For as the earth brings forth its shoots, and as a garden causes what is sown in it to spring up, so the Lord God will cause righteousness and praise to spring up before all the nations." Isaiah 61:11

The earth teaches us the way that God works if we pay it a little attention. God is the one who causes shoots to come out of the ground and seeds to spring up! If you were to watch these things happen this entire afternoon expecting to see the growth, I may think you are crazy. However, if you were to trust that God causes the growth over the course of this break with small moments of turning towards Him, I may think you are beginning to understand.

Growth

Have you grown since yesterday?

This is an interesting question. Like a blade of grass turning to its lawn buddy blade and asking, "Do I look taller or more lush to you today?" Or the time I overheard the little oak tree ask the sparrow how mighty it had become since their last encounter one day earlier. It is an interesting and maybe irrelevant question.

There are times that we need to stop and gaze down from the heights of our forrest and remember our mighty smallness. It is good to remember the simpleness of what once was, how far one has come.

But, to merely think back will get us nowhere if we do not continue attending to the cultivation that made this growth possible. We will soon die if we lose ourselves in the bliss of recollection. In fact, I suggest that remembering should compel us toward action. It should goad us into the possibility of the future. It should catapult our hands over the walls that lead to inaction and passivity.

How great a task it is to remember! Growth happens. Where has it happened in your life? Be careful as you remember.

Children and College Students

I mentioned earlier that I had talked to Mark Waldron about our students' willingness (or lack thereof) to serve. In that conversation I mentioned that I always struggle with a good, healthy balance between being the prophet and the pastor. The prophet calls students to change their lives. Repent before God's destruction comes! The pastor is the gentle one who offers understanding and guides the sheep in green pastures to quiet waters. Balancing the two is very difficult. When do I challenge? When do I be gentle?

I was mentioning this to Mark and he said, "Welcome to life as a parent! You will be struggling with this the rest of your life." I knew what he was talking about, but I guess it had not occurred to me that as I grow in my ability in raising Kayla and our other little one(s) my ability in ministering to college students will also grow.

The whole conversation made me realize that I do have some understanding in balancing prophet and pastor, but it will continue to grow as Kayla grows. John Huber mentioned that he could see the same thing in Barry, the previous campus minister. When he came he had one child and had two more while he was here. Through that experience, his ability to minister grew.

Cool deal. Thank you, Lord, for encouraging me to connect all aspects of my life. As I grow in one, another grows. You are so good, God.

How did I become so mature?

Have you ever looked at your life and noticed that you have done a little growing up in Christ? You tried to pin down an event that did it, but couldn't. It is not like the growth that happened at a Youth Camp one summer or a major life changing event. You can't quite put your finger on what made you grow, but all you know that you were a different person two or three months ago. What is it that brought you to this point?

Every single day of our life we engage ourselves in conversations, we listen to certain radio stations, we go to certain stores, we sit in classes, and we go to work. We do many things in the course of one day. There are those situations that come along where you find yourself talking to someone about God, or something the DJ says makes you think about religion, or you take time to read the Bible one evening and learn something you never knew before.

As we go about the business of living, small choices that we make help us grow. You might look back and say something like, "You know, it was this conversation I had with Janet that really got me to thinking about God more." Or maybe, "My professor really challenged me with a new idea I had never thought of before." Because we have chosen to have that conversation, to go to class that day, a little bit of growth has happened. You probably can't see it at that point, but after a couple of months or even weeks you might notice if you take the time to look. "I've done a little growing up in Christ!"

Think about the small choices that you make today. Choose what is good. Choose what is edifying. Choose what is godly. Growth is happening...even as you chose to read this entry all the way through. Have a wonderful day :-D